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You think you cannot communicate?

Posted 24 April 2002, 7.18 pm by Shaggy


I was thinking of how character interpretation is driven. I was wondering why I (and all other humans... come on, don't lie!) judge people upon seeing them, and how I can easily classify people and immediately have a huge picture of their character, simply by what clothes they wear. "Oh, he's a jock. He must be stupid."

Admittedly, most of my characterizations are vague and tend to not be as restricting as the above quote. Yet, I often wonder how many wonderfully interesting people I have missed talking to, merely because they dressed a way that proved irksome to me, or in a fashion that I found was not very representative of the characteristics that I enjoy in people.

However, I find comfort in the fact that I surely must indeed come off as a socially inept and disturbed individual. Let me explain myself:

When I first met my present girlfriend, I ended the night with: "I had fun. We should hook up together sometime. THAT IS, ahem, we should you know, get together... uhm... you know... that is to say..."

That was the first night that I smacked my forehead and called myself an idiot. The second time was when her father and his fiancee were driving me home. I had an interesting night (her father is a rather interesting bloke that never ceases to surprise, for better or worse), but I didn't want to seem too eager to return. After all, from what I have learned from television about dating, a man must not seem too eager. For some reason, actually wanting the woman is creepy. So I told him that I would see him later. I immediately thought that the comment might have been perhaps a bit too committal, so I immediately returned, "that is to say, I MIGHT see you later."

My life is filled with these moments. Moments when I feel so intolerably socially-inept that I wonder how I manage to function in a social environment at all. Sometimes I just don't function in a social environment, either making someone angry at me, or what other negative event I can manage to stir.

And yet, people still tell me how smart I am. That is to say, they still think that I actually have an inkling of intelligence. This sometimes puts a lot of pressure on me. I look back at those I love and feel like I owe them something somehow. And dagnabit, I like feeling smart. A little self-deception is helpful, or at least in moderation.

So I guess my point is that, as long as people will falsely judge me as smart, I will try to beat insurmountable odds to actually live up to that expectation.

However, the one thing that only a select few have actually commented on is my compassion. And yet, I still find myself somehow motivated to be as compassionate and helpful as I can be. The motivation is innate, and unspoken.

I don't want much. All I want is world peace and to be as smart as people think I am.

Oh and I want to be rich and famous in the meanwhile.

Waldo
on 24 April 2002, 9.04 pm
I think it's important to know that you're going to misjudge everyone you meet and everyone that you know and to plan accordingly by planning on not planning at all.

PLANNING!

Verbal gaffs are unavoidable but they had might as well be because you weren't trying to plan everything out rather than because you had planned every word (thereby making you increasingly fallible and bearing blame).

That's not to say you shouldn't think when you speak.

If anything else I've learned that I'm confused.


Alexander
on 24 April 2002, 11.32 pm
Can I just say goddamn akpcep has some of the best writing I've read on the net?

Yeah OK, so it's my site, but I still feel my opinion is valid.


Berly
on 25 April 2002, 3.21 am
I love Shaggy. Too bad he's so smart that he realizes his current girlfriend is a better deal than I am. My loss. Her gain.

I must really be shallow. The first thing I think of is "Is he cute?". I'm not sure when the question of smarts comes into play.

kidding.

sort of.

I still love you Shaggy. Great work.


Tamedknee
on 25 April 2002, 4.02 am
I know the feeling... try not to think too much, otherwise you'll start stuttering a problem I'm still trying to fully overcome.


GLADIATOR
on 25 April 2002, 9.20 am
Nice article Shaggy. And what you desire is probably in most other persons agenda as well. The desire to be respected for what we are and to live up to the expectations others may have of us.
Thanks for writing it.


news-
on 4 August 2004, 7.18 am


news-
on 4 August 2004, 7.20 am


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This is again from the 'Faces of Death' cycle. In this piece, the mottled effect was produced by flicking turpentine at the image once it was smeared into the ink.


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Hmph

80s candy bars were pretty good

only because i traded it for a candy bar in the 80's.

lol we all know you don't have a soul ghoti

my soul for some carbs...

But of course!

Yo ! Does this work ?

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