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laughed my ass off!

Posted 6 August 2003, 10.09 am by TonyChef

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/stripordie.php

Seize the day.

Posted 5 August 2003, 9.02 pm by Jake

Carpe Diem. Seize the day. Seize the fucking day.

This little adage rattles around in everyone’s head, whether there’s vacant space there or not. Everyone chooses to take a chance every once in a while. Whether for good or for bad, you can always rest assured that there’s some gung-ho hero out there busting ass trying to make their own difference…but in what sense? How much of a difference can be made nowadays? Personally, I like the statement. But I’m selfish, you see. I take a leap of faith when I think it’s a good time to do so, for me (and sometimes for others). Self-improvement is the big thing nowadays, it seems. But everyone has their own perception of self-improvement. Bigger dicks, bigger tits, a facelift, more muscles…all of these are people’s goals. Many think that self-improvement only exists in the physical aspect, and that’s where they fail.

We’re all so busy trying to impress others with what we can readily present to them, that nobody’s willing to take the chance to get to know someone or get into a situation that, while a little scary, might actually do them some good. Maybe self-improvement should become a term that’s almost readily interchangeable with the concept of self-sacrifice. People piss and moan about changing things, about making life better, but they fail to realize everyone has to improve before everything else does. You have to take the incentive. You have to be the voice of protest, the voice of reason. We have to become better people before we can readily judge others. Experience is a must. Too many people try to be the hero, yet they are ill-equipped to do so. They fling themselves headlong into whatever they can in order to be a martyr, to prove their self-worth. Observation is key. A sense of understanding is a must. You can read all of the books in the world, you can propose philosophical theories until your head spins like Linda Blair, and you can stand on your soapbox and scream bloody murder until God’s wrath rains down upon us all in a veritable hailstorm of judgment, but you can’t really say shit until you’ve been there. Until you’ve taken a chance. Until you’ve proved what you’re made of. And why do I take it upon myself to say all this?

Because I’m totally fucking flawless. The rest of you, however, have a lot of room to improve.
(And before anyone wants to get anal and piss and moan about my last line, IT’S A JOKE. Take a deep breath, remove the stick from your ass, and enjoy it while you can.)

Don't buy CDs

Posted 4 August 2003, 6.58 am by Alexander

Although fairly clumsily written, this site gathers together some of the more convincing arguments against the mainstream recording industry.

This is why my band is eschewing major label pursuit for an independent approach.

Non-existent books in existent books

Posted 3 August 2003, 5.16 pm by berly

Resource of fictional titles pulled out of real ones.

http://www.invisiblelibrary.com/

Uh, my browser won't allow the help window to come up. I know this isn't in proper format. It's been so long that I've forgotten the codes. Can you guys fix the link for me?

Alexander: "Sure thing, lady"

Are you listening?

Posted 21 July 2003, 5.50 pm by Jake

I have returned.

I took some time off from writing in order to let my creative juices stew. Unsurprisingly, I'm dissatisfied with the results. I'm sure that personal reasons factor in here somewhere, but I'm not going to bore you with my life, as I'm sure you have much better things to do, such as write an epic novel-form pseudo-philosophical analysis of life, death, and perception as we know it, or maybe to record your own scarred little emotions (that fluctuate like the size of Oprah Winfrey's ass) in your livejournal. Maybe you're going to trip out on some hallucinogenics and write some psychedelia-inspired piece about existence that nobody will understand, or, maybe, nobody will care to understand. Or maybe you'll just sit there, wallowing in your own angst and misery, because it really IS everybody else's fault that you're misunderstood.

When you've got nothing but time on your hands, keeping yourself busy is harder than you think. I could be working out. I could be getting a tan. I could be masturbating. Instead of all of that, I've decided to devote my time to sitting inside, being rather pasty, and working on a cathartic act of self-expression. Sure, self-expression is becoming a run-of-the-mill thing on the Internet, but it's all we've got left. Sadly enough, the Internet could very well be the last bastion of honest, visceral, emotional connections between people. Sure, it's not as good as real life, but we're all too inhibited to talk to each other like this on a streetcorner, or in a restaurant. We're afraid of what others might think. We're afraid of others. But, I'm going to just not care about other people. So, you guys can do as you wish. Whether it's trying desperately to fit in with another ethnic group, losing yourself in online MMORPGs, or pretending to be a ripe teenage girl so that you can prey on young boys in a chatroom, I'll be busy not caring.

In the meantime, I'll be cranking out another one of my patented violent, unimpressive, sub-par attempts at a short story, or maybe some clichéd piece of cultural commentary that's supposed to actually change people's perceptions of events as we know it. I could be out modifying cars and citing my incredibly self-absorbed ability to fuck everything that walks (only if it would sit still for just one second), but no. I'm going to write something, and prove my worth. I'm going to make someone think. I can make a difference. I can make one person think. And, that person is me. After all, I'm the only one who matters. Right?

.....Right? Oh, that figures. I'm wrong.

THE INEVITABILITY OF CHANGE (Conclusion – continued from Heaven & Hell)

Posted 18 July 2003, 9.07 am by The Green Mamba

Because Alexander requested it, so blame him - haha

I wasn’t going to write any sort of conclusion to my series of posts on The Holographic-Shamanistic-Quantum-Animistic Model of The Universe, but there appears to be some confusion about the whole basis for these articles. I think the main reason for these misinterpretations is because in Quantum Physics and spiritualism conventional logic falls away. In order for it to make sense you have to look beyond the commonly accepted scientific laws governing the possibility or impossibility of the data presented.
Our biggest mistake was using conventional words like “mind”, “soul” and “consciousness” for things that we simply didn’t have any other words for yet. In our own minds we were able to distinguish the various “alternative” meanings of these terms, but we never realised that other people wouldn’t pick up on that.

In light of this, let me clarify the following about our discussions:
Firstly, they weren’t written as any sort of final truth. They were written as an analysis of newly acquired scientific data in comparison with documented metaphysical experiences.
Secondly, the theories that we discussed are not new (even though I would have liked to claim that they are). After our discussion we furthered our search into what is called Quantum Animism (sometimes called Quantum Tantra) eventually discovered that many of our theories are already documented by Quantum founding father Werner Heisenberg.
Thirdly. Simply because we wrote a certain phrase doesn’t mean that we actually believe it. It simply means that we included into our discussion because we thought at the time that it warranted further investigation.

The end result of our discussion was an affirmation of The Beast, one of our core beliefs in the monster called Modern Culture and a possible basis for its existence within the group/cultural mind - Substantiated by all the source documents, independently.
That everything within the Universe is connected - Substantiated by all the source documents through the Zero-point Field Theory.
That what we eventually referred to as The Mind is physical matter interacting with energy, whereas Consciousness is most likely Quantum Energy (also known as Dark Energy) – Indirectly substantiated by a combination of The Holographic Universe, Edgar Mitchell and The Path.
That there is a higher probability for an omnipresent (but not necessarily omnipotent) consciousness (although not a sentient being) to exist throughout the universe than against it – Indirectly substantiated by all the source documents combined
That we are spiritual beings (energy) first and thereafter physical - our Minds may govern our bodies, but Consciousness (Quantum/Dark Energy) governs the mind – Indirectly substantiated all the source documents combined.
That our physical sensory capabilities dominate and limit us to our perception of reality –Substantiated by The Holographic Universe, Edgar Mitchell and The Path.
That metaphysical experiences appears to be directly linked to Quantum Physics and what religion calls “heaven” could just be an expansion of human awareness beyond the limitations of our physical reality – Indirectly substantiated by all the source documents combined, but particularly Edgar Mitchell and The Path
That “prophets” are most likely people who were/are able to expand their awareness beyond physical reality and that our elevation of their stature within society is because of our inability to explain it through our “logical” model of reality – Indirectly substantiated by all the source documents combined.

Following that, here are the most prominent changes to my own belief structure:

From being Agnostic to believing that the universe arises from a blueprint, which is “god” (a Consciousness without personality - it is not “wrathful” nor “loving” except as how we interpret the way in which it behaves), and we are a part of this blueprint. Not a separate part, but an indivisible part of a whole.
That prophets like Mohamed, Buddha and particularly Jesus were actual people and that Jesus truly was the “son of god” (within the context of the above definition of god) i.e. The Jesus I believe in is not the sacrificial saviour of mankind, but the potential example of what we could become.
From believing that consciousness (sometimes referred to as soul for simplicity’s sake) resides within our physical minds to believing that it exists separately and independently from our perception of reality.
That all ancient myths, legends and religious writings are sources to a truth that we, as humans, have forgottenlost. Not any one of them contains the ultimate truth, but each of them is part of a great jigsaw puzzle that makes up the whole truth.
That religious institutes like the church does not teach us to search for the truth (as the various prophets intended), but instead only tries to force its opinions onto us. It is a narrow-minded, self righteous institute that only cares about preserving it own social (and sometimes economical) interests under the pretence of salvation.
In addition to that I believe that the truth is not something that is “out there” or bigger than anything that we can comprehend. It is within each of us, but not just that … it is within everything around us, from a single grain of sand to the Universe as a whole, independently or as a whole. We see it every day and yet we are blind to it, because we are governed by our own pre-conditioned, personal beliefs. Only when we dare to look beyond what we have been conditioned to see by modern culture through religion, traditional science and conventional logic … can we break free from the prison that we built around ourselves.

From the time we wrote these articles to date, we continue to find new, previously inexplicable, documented mystical and scientific phenomena that fit perfectly into The Holographic-Shamanistic-Quantum-Animistic Model of The Universe. No other model based on actual scientific data has ever managed to accomplish that.

In the same breath, need I remind you that our definition of existence is only as relevant as the information we have on hand at the time of defining it.
New information leads to new truths … reaffirming the inevitability of change.

FIN

NOTE: I didn’t run this conclusion/summary past Dragonfly, so he might have a few things to add/amend/clarify.

Distance Healing

Posted 18 July 2003, 4.39 am by Dragonfly

In 1988 a breakthrough occurred in scientific research on interpersonal psychology. Dr. Randolph Byrd, MD, conducted a study involving 393 patients of a coronary care unit, that were assigned randomly either an intercessory prayer group or control group. There was no contact between prayer groups and patients, to negate the possibility of the placebo effect. After ten months, Byrd reported that the patients being prayed for suffered less severe symptoms and required less medication. Although numerous critics pointed out flaws in the data, this study had achieved a marked breakthrough – it made the research of distance healing legitimate work.
Since then, over 100 studies have been done in this area, but none have been considered more than mediocre at best. But this is changing. Respected scientists at major institutions like Harvard, Duke or the Mayo Clinic are conducting serious research and publishing findings in mainstream journals.
For example, in 1994 Fred Sicher led a study on the effects of distant healing on advanced AIDS patients. To ensure legitimacy of the research, protocol was discussed and reviewed by numerous scientists, by AIDS specialists, and by self-identified healers before the first patient was enrolled. Two studies were eventually completed, a pilot of twenty patients, followed by a confirmatory study of another forty patients. The pilot, considered exploratory, produced the surprising finding of 40 percent mortality in the control group, but no deaths in the treatment group. This striking result occurred despite the fact that patients and researchers did not know who was in the treatment group, and that the two groups were equal in severity of the disease. Both of these studies are reported in the December 1998 issue of the Western Journal of Medicine.

Now there is new research underway on distant healing by Elizabeth Targ, MD, funded by the National Institute of Health. Two studies are being conducted with 150 patients each, one with AIDS and the other with glioblastoma multiforme, a rare aggressive brain tumor that has a mortality rate of 97% in the course of five years. Randomly selected individuals shall be the focus of a variety of prayer groups including Christian, Jewish, Buddhist, Native American and energy healing practitioners, all with at least 17 years of experience and faith in their work. Each distant healer is given the first name, a photograph, and a description of symptoms of the patient. Then they sit one hour every day for six days, have a week off, and then are given a second subject. This being a double-blind experiment, there is no contact between healers and patients or doctors, and neither patients nor doctors know who is being treated and who is not.

There is a wide range of opinion in this area of research, still viewed by many as controversial. D.J.Benoir, MD, is of the opinion that “if prayer were a drug, it would be approved for use by now.” Only 5 years ago doctors conducting prayer research were afraid of losing credibility, but as this is changing we might finally be moving forward to some answers.

To make your own balanced view on the subject, here’s some of the sources I consulted for this piece:
the critics
the supporters
the middle-view

Dave Brockie Experience - Songs For The Wrong

Posted 16 July 2003, 4.17 am by The_Roach

Unintelligible and bizarre lyrics. Composition style that seemingly consists of having a hamster shit on a musical staff. Vocals that make you want to rupture your eardrums with whatever happens to be handy. These are the hallmarks of Dave Brockie Experience, side project of GWAR members Dave Brockie, Mike Derks and Brad Roberts.

Songs For The Wrong, the ambitious follow-up to their 2001 debut Diarrhea of a Madman, is ... well, it's certainly something. You simply can't say that a group of individuals like this have "matured", but the album is far more cohesive than earlier work. This is probably more due to writing an album instead of slapping a group of previously unreleased tracks with a few newly written songs than any sort of new synergy between musicians who have played together for years already.

Juvenile tracks about getting head from unattractive women and having sex with the mentally challenged are the stock in trade. Still, the album manages to balance these out with songs about the massacre at Shatilla, a soldier thinking of his mother as he dies and I Wanna Be A Squirrel, a wacky ditty that's probably the closest thing to an honest love song Brockie is capable of producing. Toss in an Irish drinking song and a reflection on the lack of cheese in Chinese cuisine, and you've got a well-played if fucking stupid collection.

Is it good music? Yes and no. Derks' guitar work is spectacular throughout and, as Brockie's ego has apparently allowed for someone else to have a bit of the limelight, we do get the opportunity to enjoy a good bit of talented instrumental work on a few tracks (He's Going Crazy! being the best example). Much of the album is annoying to no end however, containing humor that was better left on the playground. I expect nothing less than to have it in my player for months to come.

And, whatever you do, don't look at the sixth page of the liner notes under any circumstances.

Archives: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93

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I took this photograph in North Vancouver, by the water. These birds are everywhere, all the time. If you are standing in the middle of a crowd of these birds, you realize just how horrid they are. The photo I took actually makes the birds look respectable and that's why I like it.

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80s candy bars were pretty good

only because i traded it for a candy bar in the 80's.

lol we all know you don't have a soul ghoti

my soul for some carbs...

But of course!

Yo ! Does this work ?

* Alexander wonders if this still works

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