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What's Your Fetish

Posted 4 April 2002, 6.37 pm by Craig


Konichiwa! I like tiny little asians!What's Your Fetish? Take the test at Nollykin's World.
Tell me What your Fetish is in the Comments!!

Blade 2

Posted 2 April 2002, 10.29 pm by Alexander

Those of you familiar with the original Blade will know of Wesley Snipe's 'Daywalker'. Half Vampire, half human, all the strengths and abilities of Vampires, but with a special serum that appeases his need for blood, he's a vampire hunter. And he has a fucking cool car.

The original was an extremely stylish, very silly, very violent action movie. It was extremely good in this respect. For the sequel, it seems director Guillermo del Toro (Kronos, Mimic) has said "Right, the first one was good, but there was too much acting, plot, and characterisation. The result is one of the most visually exciting, consistently violent and stylish action movies of recent times.

And when I say consistently violent, I mean the film is pretty much one big fight sequence. It's magnificent. The plot, such that it is, concerns a new breed of undead (called 'Reapers] lead by none other than Matt Goss (from Bros), who actually does admirably. Not surprising, considering all he really has to do is hiss and wear about 7 tons of latex. These 'Reapers' are feeding on Vampires, and our man Blade is sequestered by the Vampire elite to lead a 'crack' team of vampires in battle against these nasty little fucks.

Lots of things get beaten, shot, blown up and eaten. Some of the completely unnecessary fight scenes (ex: two messengers from the vampires infiltrate Blade's stronghold to deliver a message, the fight scene lasts about 10 minutes - they could have knocked) are so over the top, Snipes and his human opponent are given a cup of tea and a comfy seat while CGI wizards take care of it. The CGI is sometimes a little ropey, but your disbelief is by this point suspended somewhere above the auditorium, so you don't really give a fuck. The reaper's are the foulest thing seen on screen since Predators (to which they owe a debt) and the love interest vampire chick is dull enough to not interfere with the ass kicking. Which is good.

For gods sake, Blade WWF-style suplexes people, Matt Goss does a flying elbow drop on Blade by jumping crouching-tiger style to the top of a room and plunging about 600ft onto his chest, elbow first. What's not to like?

Absolutely insane. A new dawn in completely brainless cinema. A fucking masterpiece. Really really stupid. Just see it for god's sake.

What would Jesus Drive?

Posted 2 April 2002, 8.58 pm by Craig

I've been looking to purchase a new car recently. Unfortunately, there are so many makes and models to choose from. So, like any other time I have a choice, I ask myself "What Would Jesus Do?"

Visit Site.

Pitch

Posted 2 April 2002, 9.16 am by Berly

So I made myself sit down and watch this movie. I promised myself I’d write a review of it – no matter how I felt about it afterwards.

By the way, the only reason I’m even trying to write a review is because this section gets the least action…somewhat like my real life, actually.

This is a “Toronto Independent Film Festival” winner. Problem is, they do not tell you what award it won. I’m guessing it won the “ugly truth about Hollywood” award.

The film documents (although I would not call this a full fledged documentary) the extraordinary efforts of two pals attempting to sell a screenplay they’ve written. While the film has some interesting qualities, it is mostly an insincere, translucent attempt to draw attention to the authors. In fact, Spencer Rice and Kenny Hotz remind me of two girls going after the same boy at a sixth grade pool party. A lot of whining and hostility. The only thing missing is some hair pulling.

In the beginning, the pair achieve some grins by making telephone calls to big name actors and basically get their asses handed to them on a paper plate. Later they move to the Toronto Independent Film Festival (1996), where people start to take notice of them, simply because they have a camera and “are making a movie”. More ugly truths about the movie business are revealed. They take their craziness to California. More hilarity insues – the end.

It’s not a horrible film, but if you have something better to do – like pulling weeds or something – I’d go do that instead of watching this. To be fair, there was one review on Amazon.com, and it was favorable. If you are interested in selling scripts or the movie business in general – maybe you will enjoy this film. I don’t know. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve disliked something that many other people adore.

An Analysis of All that Is Pt.1

Posted 2 April 2002, 1.39 am by Alexander

This is a reader submission from James. I really enjoyed it, what are your thoughts?

What am I? I am James, a 16-year-old high school student in the United States of America - a resident of Earth, the third planet from a lone, medium-sized star in the center of the Milky Way galaxy. In approximately 5,000,000,000 Earth-years, that star (called 'the Sun] will have depleted its supply of hydrogen and will no longer generate enough energy or pressure to support its own outer layers. As it collapses, its pressure and temperature will then rise until helium begins to fuse into carbon and 'helium burning' begins, radiating so much energy that the Sun expands into a larger form, known to us as a 'Red Giant'. At this point, ignoring time-wasting hypothetical possibilities, any remains of my species and culture will be quickly vaporized and forgotten by the universe as the star that once warmed my planet's beaches reduces it to so much atomic dust.

One discovers...all things are finite - because I will exist for such an insignificant amount of time, as will my planet, I see this event as a grand ending to a long and complicated story, while it is (from a broader point-of-view) only a single wave crashing on the rocks of the universe, which will stand unmoved for time untold. My self-awareness, combined with my ability to rationalize, discover, and create, defines me as an organism . . . but I am not truly defined until I give myself a name.

The question again: What am I?

I am a single, unremarkable specimen of a species known as homo-sapien, or human. My people are the current rulers of a 6.5 zetta-ton rock that hurtles through space in an arc around the catalyst of its future destruction. Short of controlling and altering the dimensions of space and time, a feat beyond even my mere comprehension today, there is nothing I can do in my eye-blink of an existance to make a definitive impression on the universe. I am left to persue happiness in my lifetime by embracing my own self-importance and creating a legacy of actions and creations that will remain with my fellow organisms after I cease to be. But first, a note on how humans got to where they are today . . . That gradual growth leads to the possibility of any human's actions becoming drastically relevent in regard to the uncertain future of the universe.

When my people first began to evolve and create, they were unaware of Earth's unavoidable fate. They competed with the other organisms of our planet for supremacy, as their genes bid them to do; they ate, drank, slept, and reproduced, using natural biological advantages to remain safe from potential predators and dangerous to potential food-sources. Upon the first moment, however, that one of my ancestors raised a blunt object and brought it down upon an opponent, homo-sapiens broke the cycle of Nature and became innovators. Our sentience had advanced in its complexity beyond those traits which we had earned naturally through 'survival of the fittest', and we inherited a planet.

Domination ensued, and the human brain continued to grow. A stick or bone begot a cleverly sharpened edge, which begot a finely crafted knife, which begot a gun, which begot a bomb, which begot a nuclear explosive. The first deviations in our evolutionary trajectory sped up the process and broke the chain of events that 'nature intended' - the newest deviations are far beyond what could ever be considered natural at all. They defy the inherent genetic programming of the beings who created them, as tools that have the potential to destroy all life were borne of organisms whose immediate purpose is simply to live. Somewhere along the line, order was thrown aside, and civilization now teeters on the brink of chaos.

All of human-kind's 'advances' evolve in a similar pattern - forget about weaponry or tools aiding competition and focus on transportation. Rafts and horses begot boats and wagons, which begot steamships and trains, which begot motor boats and automobiles, which begot airplanes, which begot the space shuttle. We began by advancing on what was natural to make the tasks we faced easier - we end in excess, reaching out beyond our planet and exploring the vast space that surrounds it. Even this is not the end of the evolution, however - space travel turns nature on its head, but time travel shatters it completely. Like the development of the nuclear bomb, our likely discovery of time manipulation will make the chaos of modern life even more profound, as it too breaks down the barrier between what is considered a universal truth (the 'circle of life', linear progression of time) and what is possible due to unrestrained human innovation (the self-inflicted destruction of all life, distortion of time as we know it).

Perhaps our view of what is true or false, natural or unnatural, is skewed - there's a chance that we see ourselves as interrupting the natural way of things because our idea of what that design entails remains stunningly primitive. The human habit of defining everything in ideas and language translatable to our own lives could have kept us from discovering the secret truths behind the curtain of the physical. We could argue for one side or another until we were blue in the face, but officially, this is where our discussion reaches a stalemate, and I abandon it altogether.

I am no longer a short-lived, anonymous homo-sapien - once again, I am James, and I have roughly sixty years left to live. Without resigning myself to an agonizing exploration of the universe's mysteries or an overly optimistic and self-serving religion, I am left with a pursuit of my personal happiness and final legacy. To continue existing beyond the limited corporeal sense of the word, I have to create something to leave behind for my species to remember or physically posess. A painting, a story, a monument . . . anything. Though it is initially simple, this process is complicated by our society's unwavering exponential progression. We have now at our fingertips technology capable of both duplicating our own physical forms entirely and creating an original being to our specifications . . . and this future ability raises serious questions about our responsibility to that which we create in our lifetime. If we create an artificial lifeform in our own image, we are not abandoning, destroying, or radically altering the role of Nature or God - we are personally assuming it. In the process, we are unconsciously accepting the possibility that as homo-sapiens defied the boundries of nature, our creations could advance beyond our own control and alter the future of our planet and universe in ways we can't begin to fathom.

TO BE CONTINUED.

Female or Shemale

Posted 1 April 2002, 5.32 pm by Craig

Can you tell the difference.

Take the test!!

April Fools

Posted 1 April 2002, 5.26 pm by Craig

The History of April Fools Day

Click Here.

Le Pacte des loups

Posted 1 April 2002, 12.15 am by Sickan

The year is 1766 in Southern France. A monster is killing people and the locals are scared shitless, they fear it is a werewolf. The King sends out a team to kill the bastard…
Hm… actually I wouldn’t under any other circumstances tell people to see this movie because there are some annoying flaws in it and I hate that… but he way its cut and filmed is too brilliant! And the colours are just right!
If you are ready to look beyond the rather big flaws in a movie and (if you aren’t French) can tolerate that it is a French-spoken movie, then I would really encourage you to see this one. It is rather beautiful!

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"New Orleans at Night" Acrylics on Canvas. I recently saw a shot of Bourbon street in New Orleans. I liked the shot enough that I wanted to paint something like it, to sort of reproduce the feelings the photograph gave me. I want to go to New Orleans myself and do another painting in the same vein.

Spooky

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Hmph

80s candy bars were pretty good

only because i traded it for a candy bar in the 80's.

lol we all know you don't have a soul ghoti

my soul for some carbs...

But of course!

Yo ! Does this work ?

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