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Peter Pan and various other goodies

Posted 1 February 2002, 10.48 pm by Craig

WoW, I didn't know that the famous childrens character Peter Pan had a home page... Cool

Peter Pan Home Page

Now, if you have recovered from the Killer Japanese Seizure Robots, why not check out this little gem. Warning... you may die!! Check it out Now!!.

I Only Write Crap.

Posted 1 February 2002, 8.28 am by The_Roach

Well, that's my opinion on it at least. I have never written anything that has been "up to snuff", frankly. There have been concepts that I thought had merit, techniques that felt effective, and the occasional metaphor that seemed to really hit home. I am a critic at heart, snubbing film, television and literature at every turn. However, everyone excepting myself gets the benefit of the doubt, and frequently a second chance before complete dismissal. I've never had a piece that combined all of these elements, nothing that I would have determined to contain any real Quality.


"Quality... you know what it is, yet you don't know what it is. But that's self-contradictory. But some thingsare better than others, that is, they have more quality, But when you try to say what the quality is, apart from the things that have it, it all goes poof! There's nothing to talk about. But if you can't say what Quality is, how do you even know what it is, or how do you know that it even exists? If no one knows what it is, then for all practical purposes it doesn't exist at all. But for all practical purposes it really does exist. What else are grades based on? Why else would people pay fortunes for some things and throw others in the trash pile? Obviously some things are better than others...but what is the "betterness"?...So round and round you go, spinning mental wheels and nowhere finding any place to get traction. What the hell is Quality? What is it?"
-Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance


There's a certain method to my writing, a certain set of rules that I always follow. I always have a cigarette burning in the ashtray, regardless of whether or not I intend to smoke it. There is always a Mountain Dew to my right and a shot of vodka to my left, the soda for during, the vodka for afterwards.

Writing takes on an erotic element, starting out slow and uncertain. I can feel the words that I want to say gathering within my brain, anticipating release, but not sure of whether the risk of releasing the impulse is worth the possibility of rejection, that chance that they will be pushed away, left feeling broken and alone. Eventually, they find the courage to creep out and grace the page. Delicate caresses, nearly unnoticable at first, with the occasional awkward grope that doesn't turn out the way it was intended. If one of these is too severe, the whole piece will come sputtering to a halt, thrown off the page and forced to hide in the deep recesses of my mind, likely never to resurface.

If they make it past this point, the words begin to peel away layers, revealing more of their intent. Emboldened by it's success thus far, it begins to find it's rhythm. Soon, the words and the page are linked together, inseperable from one another and every additional word that finds it's way has a purpose. Slowly, but surely, the intensity increases as text fills the page in a torrent of passion. There is no stopping the concepts now, as they scream for release.

Finally, the logical conclusion occurs. La petite mort. I drink the vodka.

Then, I sit and read, basking in the afterglow. For those first five minutes, every word is ecstacy to pass over. The recent experience of writing them still fresh in my mind, they have no flaw. As time passes, though, I begin to see the errors, the tiny cracks in the dam where water seeps through. It wasn't a perfect experience. Far from perfect, in fact. Hindsight is 20/20, I suppose.

I drink the vodka.

NoVels...

Posted 1 February 2002, 6.21 am by Sickan

Chapter 3
He enjoyed the silence in the house after the staff had gone home. There was always a little comfort in sitting alone in the great mansion, the old noises the ancient house made and the silent sagas it told. He nodded as if he were trying to convince himself that that was true.
He was 58 years old and had never had a family, he didn't like children; they were to destroying and dirty he had said. People had this idea about old things, they had to touch them no matter how many times you told them not to. And he had a lot of old goods, all had a special place in his heart, they were all his children.
In his early days his had been an excellent and accepted archaeologist, he had been at all the great sites and he had seen a lot. But what had been driven him had been all the tales and spooky rumours about curses and stuff like that in Egypt. He loved Egypt, that was a land of ancient pride, but now the Western world had eaten it up from the inside too, like all the other great and ancient worlds all over the world.
He shook his head.
Now he lived safe in London and in his elder days he had thrown himself over writing, he had started writing his memories and published them and then he had written some fiction and found that he was pretty good at it. Now he had received his first order from an unknown person. The person who called himself Wulf had asked him to write something dark and scary. Anthony didn't mind that as long as it kept him going, the money $ 5000 were not what had made him agree. On the other side he felt that he had no choice, Wulf hadn't written any address or anything to reach him on, he just wrote that he would contact him after one month and then pick up the short story.
Anthony rolled his chair to the writing desk and put some paper in the typewriter, bended forward and started typing.
The only sound in the great mansion was the water dropping from the bathtub. The sound was old and used.
The mansion was empty; there were no one but the body in the tub, only darkness and shadow.
The blood dropped slowly from the fingertip hanging over the edge and heavily landed on the floor. The drop smashed and clotted.
In the tub laid a silent voice. He was not yet dead, but he didn’t know that, it felt like death; it must be what death was like.
He considered the fact that he was still thinking and it also felt like he still breathed, not as if he was alive and well, but like a sick cat, slow and awaiting.
He had been looking forward to this day and now it finally felt right.
Death couldn’t be far away; he could feel the warmth from the blood running down his hands from each their wrists.
Suddenly there was a tickling sound by the window, Anthony turned slowly around, but there were nothing except the old oak tree outside.
Anthony stood up and walked to the kitchen, he fancied a cup of tea. He was actually proud of himself, he had never expected to be an author, nevertheless not a good one, but he felt good about his work and himself, something he had not felt for years. Now the past could be a closed chapter in his life. He smiled; now he even talked author-language.

The Greatest HTML Editor Of Them All

Posted 1 February 2002, 4.43 am by The_Roach

Here is a site for anyone who wants to design a website as cool as AKpCEP (yeah, right).

F*R*I*E*N*D*S

Posted 31 January 2002, 11.27 pm by Villager

Once upon a time I looked at the people I spent my time with, admired certain things about them, be it intelligence, humour, the quality of conversation you could have with them, and told myself they all counted as my friends. The people with whom I went to school, played football with, lived near.

Recently, I've taken a look at the people I spend my time with. Again, I counted those who I thought 'qualified', but I came up with only three. That, quite honestly, shocked me. I went over it again, and got the same answer. What may have caused this drop, is the criteria by which they were measured. Instead of asking what I liked about them, as I once did, I asked how they have been, as friends. How they have acted towards me when I've been down, how they've joined in my joy when I've been on top of the world. How they shut up when I'm in a mood, sensing what I feel, how they know what I find funny, and what I do not.

And it was glaring who was to be classed a 'true' friend, and who was not. Those who immediately sprang to mind for being there when i needed them, having shown their characters at the important times, and never really giving me cause to doubt them, were the same three people, over and over. No others, these three aside, demonstrated even occasionally the same character as the three.

I do not quite know whether to ask myself, 'damn, I only have three friends?', or 'I have three true friends whom I can rely upon, am I one lucky guy or what?'. One result certainly shall be that I appreciate these people more, and the positive impact that they time and time again have upon my fragile life. But such an evaluation also raises questions of another, less fruitful kind.

Am I not wasting my time socialising with people with whom I dislike much of their character? Is it not little short of idle apathy to just go with the flow, being around whoever chance may find (for that is how much of it seems)? Or, per chance, am I over analysing reality, reading too deeply into the fact that not everyone chooses to commit themselves as friends, as I might like? Standards which are set by no less than myself, in my attitudes towards those for whom I care.

Good friends are hard to find, make sure you know who yours are.

Life at it´s best...???

Posted 31 January 2002, 8.15 pm by Sickan

Sometimes I just get the feeling of being outside my life. Like I cant control it, and that really makes me sick inside. If there is one thing I want to control it’s my life, but I guess it’s the only thing I can’t really control, none of us can.
It just makes me wonder if I'm only a guide in my life? As you get older, I know that some of you might think that I'm not in the position of saying older cause I'm only 18… but I sometimes just wish back to when I could kick back and all I had to do was scream when I wanted my food or attention. I try to scream but nobody is listing, everyone is so busy with everything. Well I know they are because we all are, but I just sit here and feel as if it’s all just gone too fast. Now I'm moving away from all my friends, they are all going to a different town than I – I cant study what I want where they are going, typical!!
The worst part about this condition of mind is that it's not something I can pick up and kill or handle any way – its life and therefore it just happens! Hmm… well I know that its not like I'm all left alone, but everything is so new to me and it’s hard for me to realize that you have to break free from the what I know. I finally get a place where I'm in good hands, and then I have to leave it before I realize what I got, being kicked around all my life by others and now I'm doing this to myself.

I love my life and I'm looking forward to trying something new, but at the same time it scared the living crap out of me!! I guess that’s just life!!

Wow.

Posted 30 January 2002, 10.54 pm by Jake

Well, well, well. It's my first writing for this website, and I have no friggin' clue as to which topic I should use. So, I'll just relate a story to you guys and check your input. A friend of mine was dating a girl for a while. They got into the daily sexual habit (which accompanies MANY teenage relationships...surprise surprise) and one day, decided to take pictures. Well, that was all fine and good, but he left one of the pictures out one day and his younger brother found it and told their parents. The girl's mom prohibited her from seeing him, and his parents did pretty much the same (add a little bit of child abuse). This sent him into a deeep downward spiral, emotionally and academically. He's one of my best friends, and I hate to see him like that. Unfortunately, he's the type that likes to wallow in his own sorrow, and he can only see her at school. He has begun to expand his illegal drug pharmacopoeia and use speed and ecstasy regularly. She is always all over him, she needs him, and he needs her (although he's too proud to admit it) and I believe that they truly love each other. So with all that in mind, his parents have finally brought up the proposition of letting him talk about his needs and what he wants. Smartest thing they ever did. So, the question stands....is love really all it's cracked up to be? And if it doesn't work out in their favor, what in the hell should I do to keep him in good mental health(short of compliments and discussions)? Maybe more drugs.

Novels

Posted 30 January 2002, 5.13 pm by Sickan

Chapter 2
She walked restless around in the silent house, again left to rot she said angrily, and looked out on the green, perfectly trimmed lawn, at least everything is in order, she thought. Her mind had left her, and the novel weren't waiting for her to get herself together, neither were the strange man who had hired her to write a casual novel, something about death he had said, and then given her $5000. She had exactly one month to write the novel in, which should be more than enough. But that was then and the situation had changed a bit since, she had one week left and she had written nothing yet, it was like something had taken all her ideas away. She had never in her 38 years of living and writing experienced a writer’s blockade, but now she had one, at the most crucial time of her career. Typical, just fucking typical! The story of her life, first she married a rich and hansom business man who had a good and healthy future to give her, she married him two weeks after they meet, just to find out he was an idiot with a lot of debt and no plans for the future other than kill himself – and so he did. She inherited nothing from him and she didn't even cry at his funeral. Two days later she discovered she was pregnant, she had no choice but to keep the baby inside her and then put it up for adoption when she had delivered it.
A year later she married again and this time with a man who had the financial background in order and he didn't owe anything to anybody, but again there were a twist, he became violent when he were drunk. He raped her and threw her around ever weekend for almost 10 years, before she realized that some day he would kill her, if she didn't stop him. And so she did Christmas eve two years ago, she staged an accident; she had put a silk scarf at the top of the stair and as he were on his way down he slipped. He broke his neck.
She inherited a very large amount of money. Just as she wished.
She shook her head; get back to the present, she said to herself. There was a habit she couldn't get rid of, talking to herself. She guessed it was understandable; she was alone all day long, just writing and writing, but not any longer, now she couldn't even write a shopping list. She covered her head in her hands and moaned. She sat down by the computer and made herself write something, and suddenly she got an idea.

"I could hear the cries of the undead outside my mind. I rolled over and put my arm around the man beside me. I had forgotten his name, but it didn’t matter anymore. He had blinked for the last time; his young hearth wouldn’t beat anymore."

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They were done for an exhibition a couple of years ago . They asked for something to so with the summer. They are mixed media and oil paint on metal advertising boards - for ice cream.


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80s candy bars were pretty good

only because i traded it for a candy bar in the 80's.

lol we all know you don't have a soul ghoti

my soul for some carbs...

But of course!

Yo ! Does this work ?

* Alexander wonders if this still works

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